Fiona's in Jail!
by Woe is Me
Summary: Fiona's in jail! Will Shrek and Puss bail?
1. Fiona Makes Breakfast

Hey this is my story about Shrek and Fiona. Enjoy! Please review!!!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any characters.  
  
This takes place back in the swamp, after Shrek 2. Puss in Boots is living with Shrek and Fiona. Donkey is taking care of his kids with Dragon, so he is away. Again, please review!  
  
000  
  
It was early morning. The sun was just rising. Fiona sat up in bed. Shrek was snoring and Puss was purring while he slept. A super-loud grumbling erupted from Fiona's body. What was it? Fiona sniffed the air. So she didn't fart. She never opened her mouth, so she didn't burp either. Then it hit her. Fiona was hungry! It was her stomach!  
  
Fiona slid out of bed and slipped her fluffy bunny slippers on. She walked down the stairs into the kitchen. She swung open the refrigerator door. Empty. Absolutely empty. Fiona opened the freezer. It was just as vacant. Fiona's stomach grumbled again. She had to eat. Or somebody would get hurt. Fiona had often thought of munching on Puss on Boot's tail.  
  
000  
  
Fiona stepped out of the cottage. She breathed in the fresh morning air. Then her stomach grumbled again. "Must eat!" she thought.  
  
Fiona looked high and low for something to eat in the swamp. She felt dizzy from hunger. "MUST EAT!" she thought again. Suddenly she heard a crunching of leaves. Fiona spun around. A giant egg was standing in front of Fiona.  
  
The egg lowered his top hat and grinned. "Hello, Miss uhhh...Ogre. My name is Mr. Humpty Dumpty. You might have heard of me before. I am a famous wealthy man, and I am visiting you today to ask you if I could..."  
  
000  
  
Shrek and Puss headed down the stairs to the kitchen. "Fiona, what's for breakfast?" Shrek asked. "How do you want your eggs? Sunny side up, over- easy, scrambled, or poached?" Fiona asked, grinning, while she flipped a gigantic egg in a pan. 


	2. Fiona gets Arrested for Making Breakfast...

PLEASE REVIEW! Otherwise I don't know how my story is! Please?!? I've worked really hard on this, so please review!  
  
000  
  
Shrek, Fiona and Puss were sitting at the wooden kitchen table eating their eggs. "I thought we were out of groceries. How'd you find this delicious egg?" Shrek asked as he swallowed another bite of steaming hot egg. Fiona beamed. "You know I always find food when I'm hungry," she said. "That's my wife," Shrek smiled. "Even I must agree, these eggs are el tasty!" Puss said.  
  
Suddenly there was a knock on the door of the cottage. "I'll get it." Fiona opened the door. A man in a fancy officer uniform was standing in the doorway. He whipped a shiny gold badge out of his pocket. "Good morning, I'm Bob, an officer from the FTCPA," the officer said. "FTCPA?" "Fairy Tale Creature Protection Agency. Anyways, I believe a Mr. Humpty Dumpty visited you in the swamp to ask you if..." Just then Puss gave a loud belch. Shrek and Fiona giggled. "Awwwww, what a cute cat! What a pretty kitty! Who's a pretty kitty?" the officer cooed. "Can we get to business here?" Fiona asked, hands on her hips and tapping her foot.  
  
000  
  
"Ah, yes. Mr. Humpty Dumpty has gone missing since he came to this swamp this morning. Do you know where he's gone?" the officer asked. "Oh yeah. The egg dude. We ate him," Fiona replied nonchalantly. "You ate him?" the officer asked. His eyes grew wide. "Yep," Shrek said, leaning back on his chair. "And he was pretty good too!" Puss added. "It talks! The pretty kitty talks! Who's the pretty kitty? Who's the talking pretty kitty?" the officer said in a baby voice, tickling Puss's chin. Puss kicked his leg in between the officer's legs. "Nobody babies me and gets away with it! En guarde!" Puss whipped out a sword. "No, no, I won't baby the kitty! No, no!" the officer cried as he fought tears of pain in.  
  
"So what's the big deal about eating the egg dude?" Fiona asked resting against the open door. The officer stood up. "What's the big deal? You ate the richest, wealthiest, most affluent, did I mention rich fairy tale creature alive today!!!" the officer screamed. "Who fried him?" he asked. Shrek and Puss looked at each other then at the officer. "It was Fiona!" they cried simultaneously. Fiona sighed. "Thanks guys. You're always there for me." The officer took Fiona's arm. "I'm going to have to arrest you." "WHAT?!?" 


End file.
